It’s that time of year again. The stores are filling up with cheap chalk flavored candy, and the grocers wheel out the wilting flowers. You turn on the radio, and you can hear the cheap advertisements flying at you, “Hey guys, you have only 24 hours left until Valentine’s day! Stop by Jared Jewelers to pick up those diamonds and show her how much you love her”. It’s an awkwardly sanctioned day to sell, sell, sell. It’s also a day to make those who aren’t with someone feel like dog shit.
It isn’t the fact that we look around and consciously think, “Ah shit, another year I am irrevocably alone.” Although, that thought does slip into many people’s head. It’s more like the feeling of being out of place. It’s similar to having Christmas coming around, and you have no family. I would go as far to say that all holidays seem to have an alienating quality for people who are alone, but especially Valentine’s day. This feeling of being out of place can cause anxiety and depression.
I could assuage you with benefits of not celebrating Valentine’s day to try to make you feel better. Such as the fact you save money. You don’t have to buy flowers or stuffed bears that would be more fun to rip the head off of than buy as a gift. I could also tell you that you could spend the day loving yourself or some other garbage – but that doesn’t help.
The truth is you’re probably alone today if you are reading this article. If this bothers you, the reality is you didn’t choose how February 14th of this year is going to pan out. You see, meeting someone is a game of luck. All the lucky factors have to line up just right for things to come to fruition. You need to meet someone at the right place and the right time. They have to be the right kind of person and so do you. There are so many factors that we don’t control that beating yourself up for not finding someone is absurd. Think about all your past partners, and how you met them out of a game of chance. This year, while you’re alone on Valentine’s day, the game of chance didn’t work in your favor.
There is no reason to beat yourself up or feel sad about being alone when you realize much of it wasn’t up to you. I’ve spent at least 50% of my Valentine’s day without a date, and that’s with nearly 15 years of dating. Don’t let yourself fall into the haze of the marketing gimmicks around you. Tune out for the day, and realize being alone isn’t a big deal, and in fact, taking a year off might not be so bad.